Perhaps it's simply nostalgia... or the events that occurred a year ago today... or maybe it's just the overwhelmingly powerful feeling of having my little one nestle into my arms craving to just be "rock-a-byed" to sleep as she did tonight that brings back these emotions and memories from just over a year ago today.
No one else would know who this character is... no one except me. To everyone else... it's just another stuffed animal I tote along with Callie where ever she goes and ALWAYS place in her crib. But it's someone I would like to introduce to everyone.
This is "Pop" the monkey.
Pop rests at the top of her bed, on her pillow, where she lays her head every night. You see, Pop is, her guardian Angel. Pop came to us in January 2012. After Fred and Caroline's great adventure to Boston. And tonight... as I picked her up from her bed, she reached for him. So as I rocked the both of them... and she quickly drifted off to sleep... the sweet look on her face took me back to my baby, sound asleep on my Father's chest, tucked inside the Baby Bjorn, inside of his sub-zero weather jacket, after we had just trudged the two blocks or so of the snowy Dorchester streets and she met my Poppa.
Poppa met a sweet sleeping baby... too nestled and warm to wake up at the time... until her mother awoke her. I remember him saying "she's beautiful..."... and then my sweet baby, who had disliked nearly every man at the time... went right to her Great Poppa. She let him hug her and kiss her and as he held her in his arms... she looked at peace, comfortable. She knew she was in the arms of someone who would love her and watch over her for the rest of time.
I have only memories and one picture from that visit... which is why... just as we were walking to our gate at the airport to depart Boston, Pop jumped out at Callie. She repeatedly made the sound of a monkey until I went over to where he (and many of his friends :) were... and it was there... my 10 month old baby plucked up Pop. He's been with us ever since... and will remain with Callie forever.
February 5 marked one year since Poppa went to be with our heavenly Father, and to be honest... it wasn't until tonight that it truly hit me. So I rocked my baby a little too long... and I snuggled her close... remembering our adventure together. My mother spent the day in Salina today... just as she did a little over a year ago when I told her I was going to Boston and made her promise not to tell anyone... so she, against everything inside of her, helped me pack a single bag for my baby and me. She could only tell me not to go... to keep the peace... knowing full well that her rebel daughter (my other sister's, in a 3 way phone call, had also encouraged me to go) wouldn't be satisfied until my baby was in her Great Poppa's arms. I will cherish those memories, forever. Callie gave me the strength to do what I did... I know someday she will be grateful... and proud.
I can only begin to imagine the adventures that lie ahead for my Sweet Caroline and I... and one thing is for certain... Pop will be right along with us.
My baby, January 2012, what she would have looked like when she met her Great Poppa Urso...
and then January 2013... it's amazing how much she has changed!
Great Poppa U... watching over us all... :)
I remember you trying to decide whether or not to go. That was a hard decision for you....one that I think you made correctly. I have seen "Pop" along with you before, just never knew his story. Thanks for sharing something that is so private....
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